I am with you on remotes, Bored-Op. Loathe is a good word for how I feel about them, although now that I don't get them anymore cause part-time pukes like me don't get them, I miss that $100 bucks for three hours work! The two things I always hated more than anything about them are (1) car dealers who think they know more about how to do a radio remote break than you (I don't go to their car lot and try to sell a car!). They scream and get way too obnoxious, as they spew cliche after cliche about bad credit, zero down and the fact that anyone can get approved, even if they've had four repossessions and declared bankruptcy five times! Be honest...unless they are paying for the car in cash, you ain't going to approve them!!!!
And speaking of the guy who Lumpy Watkins Chevrolet, Ford, Chrysler, Dodge, Buick, Cadillac, Honda, Toyota, Mistubishi, Mazda, FIAT, Yugo and Used Car Wonderland says they can get approved for credit! (2) The guy who brings his wife and six kids to the remote to do his clothes and music shopping. And is at the car lot, wireless carrier, restaurant/bar, etc for the express purpose of getting a cheap t-shirt or other promotional item. Without further ado, here is the transcript of a typical encounter with the man/woman I like to call...(cue ominous music, please)..."THE GRISTLE GRABBER"!!!!
"Hey, buddy. You got a T-Shirt?"
I answer with a "yes."
After that he also asks, "You got five more of those? I need two kids small, an adult medium and a three-XL for my wife over there in the car. And, oh yeah, I want one of them haits you got in that box."
I tell him "no" but give him another t-shirt or hait to try to get him and the onion-scented body odor mixed with the 99 cent cigarette scent back to the trailer park.
But wait!!! He isn't done asking "Santa JT" for stuff. "Hey, you got any CD's in there? If you got Metallica or (fill in the blank metal band), that'd be good. My meemaw's birthday is tomorrow and I ain't done no shoppin'."
I try to explain, "I only get a few prizes and I gotta make them last for three hours, so I really can't give you anything more. Sorry, dude."
"Come on, man! I know you gotta bunch of s@#! in that van."
At this point, he plays the "I listen to the station ten hours a day" card. And I also know that he isn't going to go anywhere without something, so I do some scavenging in the van for some leftover little prize from the last remote, even if it is just some promotional single that Scott threw out of his office. Finding nothing, I give him a couple of bumper stickers and a K-Rock Girl Calendar.
"Oh...DUDE! That is awesome. Can I get about 35 of those calendars. Need some stocking stuffers for Christmas! While yeer at it, grab me about 30 more of those bumper stickers. I need something to hold that broke winder in my car together."
At this point, this dude has drawn every other "gristle-grabber" from a ten mile radius to the van, looking for free crap. Unfortunately, the next three people are some variation on this "listener". I say listener because he has a WXBQ, Z-Rock, WQUT, WTFM and Electric 99.3 and 94.9 bumper sticker on his once blue, now bondo coloured 1981 Chevrolet Chevette. And by the second break of a three hour remote, I have bumper stickers left to give away! Thanks a lot, goober!
This is why you never feed gristle-grabbers. They are like stray dogs...once you do, they'll never leave your porch!
And that's what I love about live remote broadcasts.
Peace.
TWSP