10. Committed to a mental institution for accepting a job with Clear Channel.
9. In the bathroom reading Playboy for the ‘articles.’
8. Attacked by his high school career counselor for picking goofy profession.
7. Thinks “being on line” has something to do with telephone poles.
6. Reserved parking space painted in water colors, it rained and he missed work.
5. Ex-wife #1 stole his laptop.
4. Ex-wife #2 stole his online identity.
3. Ex-wife #3 shot him.
2. Puncture wound from sitting on discarded :45 RPM needle.
...and the Number One reason why some DJ's don't respond to emails, ever:
1. Groupie has Vulcan death grip on “Mr. Microphone.”