At a rock station I worked at in the 80’s we had a term for hitting on call ins-
“Trolling the Hit Lines”
And one of the gals on the airstaff (or should that read air-staph?) actually did marry one of her listeners that used to call her often. GREAT for them as they were a very happy couple. Her story is the ONLY successful listener hookup that I had ever heard of, though I am sure there are more. I never ‘Trolled the Hit Lines’ myself as I had heard many a bad tale from other DJ’s yet--- still had to deal with the lovelorn listeners that would call me or write letters to me at the station. I kept a few of those letters and I’ll tell you it was not for keeping a file of potential future sex- IT WAS IN CASE I CAME UP MISSING! Every roommate and every lover that I have had knows these letters exist and where they are kept. At least the cops would have some clues to work with.
Anyone that knows a bit about Psychology can tell you that all DJ’s (whether live or voice tracked) can be looked upon as ‘a fixture’ in a persons life. This really becomes a problem when the caller has some mental disorder or is very introverted- shy of society, etc. HELL- you are ‘there for them, right on time like clockwork, even more reliable than a spouse or significant other, roommate or family member’. You comfort them with your company and play all their favorite songs. BACK IN THE DAY a good DJ would relate to the audience with local, Local, LOCAL- and pour on the ‘Hey- I am here for YOU!’ banter (Side note: WE NEED TO BRING THAT BACK!), and that banter would only enforce that ‘fixture’ position in their minds. DJ’s are not the only people that can become ‘fixtures’. Waiters, waitresses, baristas, grocery clerks, bus drivers… practically anyone in a service industry is subject to the possibility of becoming a fixture (in an unhealthy way) in someone’s life.
And I have to add that you can’t lump all of us DJ’s into the same pile- or even pile all DJ’s on top of the same orgy, just like you can’t do that to listeners either. It is really only a very small percentage of listeners that approach you in a sexual way. If you get a lot of these types of calls, letters, email- pat yourself on the back because this means your audience is HUGE! Note that I said ‘AUDIENCE’ and not ‘ANATOMY’.
As for the suicide calls; ya I got those too. Thank god I never got any suicide calls from anyone that had ‘a thing’ for me. But I do remember getting one call in particular where a young gal in high school had just broken up with her boyfriend that cheated on her. She was devastated and wanted to end it all. As she told me her story, she mentioned being a cheerleader, being on the debate team, having a great family and friends. That made it REAL easy for me to tell her that she sounded WONDERFUL, smart, and very lucky actually. I told her that she had so much to live for and what a shame it would be to give up on all the good things that she had going for her. THAT CALL REALLY F-ED with me as for months I wondered if she was O.K. It was probably a little more than six months later that SHE CALLED BACK and thanked me. I was so very happy to hear from her and I thanked her for letting me know she was OK! I grew up on Mercer Island in the 70’s and I know what losing friends to suicide is like. SO sad and this girl was still in high school. I never met her in person- so far as I know. You never know if these people come to listener events to see who ‘saved them’. That doesn’t really matter to me… the fact that she called back and was still alive was all I needed to know. Even better, she said that “You were right! Everything did get better.” And that she “had met a new boyfriend that treated her like a queen”. That not only made my day- it makes every day of my life a good day- even on my worst days.
In the end- SURE I LOVE MY LISTENERS! The average listeners that I entertain and inform, the ones that have ‘a thing’ for me, and the ones that call me in desperate need of someone to talk to. Love them, but I don’t have sex with them.
As for my personal life; I have had long relationships and just for the sake of some machismo or ego… whatever… I’d like to think that I am a good lover. And when I was single and would meet someone that I was interested in, I would not tell them what I did for a living until I got to know them a bit. More important was that they would get to know me without having some possible preconceived notion of what I might be. I’d just say that I was involved with computers and radio electronics. I am not fond of DJ’s that flaunt the moniker pretending to be some sex god or whatever. We are just like everyone else- humans.
GADZ I hope I have brought a little decorum to the thread as this initially struck me as an attempt to turn radio-info.com into a hookup site. SHHHEEEEESSHH- There are enough of those on this intercrap/sleazenet.
Have a GREAT EVENING!!!
DJ Alan
