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Fantastic word game

School is a good place to learn about algebra and English grammar and American history but school is not a good place to learn how to make puns, largely because most teachers have no sense of humor, although even the people who do have a sense of humor seem to never laugh at my puns, which makes me wonder how so much could be so wrong with so many people since the problem is obviously not with my puns, all of which are very clever, very creative and very funny.

Five and a half lines and I didn't include a pun. I'm slipping.
 
Very clever, very creative and very funny, the instruction booklet for the Pun-O-Matic machine kept LARadioRewind in stitches, so that he was unable to think of a pun in five lines.
 
In five lines at five different customer service desks, I tried to find my bolding pen that I left behind because that's obviously the reason I neglected to bold my beginning clue on the previous page.

Also, because I posted extra early this morning and wasn't really awake yet. ::)
 
My beginning clue on the previous page was nonexistent, so please do not point in my direction with the finger.
 
The finger is not tolerated from any band camper because we have a zero tolerance policy for that type of behavior.
 
That type of behavior might go over well if you're trying to impress a T-Bird or a Pink Lady, but when she sees something like that, Olivia Newton-John just rolls her eyes in disbelief.
 
Olivia Newton-John just rolls her eyes in disbelief when see reads some of Mr. LARadioRewind's pun filled posts (much like the rest of us) but then quite often sometime later in the day she will unexpectedly find a smile slowly spreading across her face as she thinks back on what he wrote.
 
Either style is fine with me too because it's the number of contributions that count and everyone is invited to participate regardless of their writing style as long as each contribution is a complete sentence which by definition is "a grammatical unit that is syntactically independent and has a subject that is expressed or, as in imperative sentences, understood and a predicate that contains at least one finite verb".
 
Wiggle their wealth on their finger was a favorite pastime around here, and then one day the librarian gasped, clutched her hands to her chest and exclaimed, "Oh...my...what a beautiful piece of glass!"

Speechless, I say! They left the library dazed, dumbfounded, speechless.
 
A beautiful piece of glass is what all the church members said when the new stained-glass window was installed but they would be very upset and frustrated a few days later when the church custodian announced, "I cleaned the new window but I had a heck of a time trying to get all the stains out!"
 
Trying to get all the stains out of your favorite shirt is just going to be frustrating if you don't work back the problem to the source, which is quite often a moment of distraction while eating your food.
 
Your food can be ordered and prepared several different ways because Miss Silkie is a master of many concoctions.
 
Miss Silkie is a master of many concoctions, however does she have access to a gas station across the street from her house which would have Yoo-hoo's, NABS, and 11 cent popsicles, from which she could concoct tasty dishes for the old men at the Union Hall next door?
 
The old men at the Union Hall next door will have to deal with the scrumptious stuff that Miss Silkie prepares at her shop because Yoo-Hoos, Nabs, 11 cent popsicles and gas stations are beneath her.
 
Yoo-Hoos, Nabs, 11 cent popsicles and gas stations are beneath her, however, Miss Silkie would be wise to look beneath her, to the under belly of life and consider how lucky she is to live in a world unconfused by which gas station has the best vending machines.

(It's the one across the street from my apartment)
 


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