Funny Stories/People We've Worked With Or For!

[n326jt]

Here's an opportunity for some fun!!! How about postings about some of the funny situations we've encountered? Let me get things started by a few stories about some news people...

I worked with a news girl who was a graduate of a prestigious college you would know! Although one would wonder if this was true but trust me, it was! She was shacked up with some looser type and it seemed they spent their time smoking up a storm! Anyway, there was a story about an octopus at a zoo in the market which had been seriously injured but was nursed back to reasonable health by the zoo staff. Somehow, the story did not come out of her mouth in exactly the right way! I still remember hearing it on the air as a quote, "...the octopus is doing well despite having several of its testicles cut off"!!! Now just in case you also graduated from this well known college, let me explain...the octopus has "tentacles" and definitely not "testicles"!

Another newsgirl, or should I say another college newsgirl...some kid stole a car and drove it out of state. This kid was arrested there. As normally is the case, the court procedure would be called "extradition"...where the suspect would be brought back to the original jurisdiction where the crime took place. Understand, this was a 17 year old kid. The story once on the air came out as "...procedures are now underway to have (the kids name) 'executed'. Yes, we did get lots of calls about this one!


OK people, now your turn!!!

Have fun. Make us laugh!

 

[hipporadio]

It's ON FIRE - but it's only FM...

OK... I’ll try my hand at this with an “oldie-but-goodie” from 31-years ago when AM was “King” and FM was a GM’s personal play-toy.

My story comes from WHON/WQLK Richmond, Indiana circa 1976. WHON was a live Top-40—WQLK was the fully automated FM music repository for the station’s somewhat eclectic GM who developed into quite the Patti Page groupie while working at WKDA in Nashville. He couldn’t imagine life in the Rose City without giving the gift of her music to the 100 or so people who actually listened to 96.1 at that time. The studios, AM-DA, and separate FM tower were just outside of town on several acres. The facility was affectionately known as “The Radio Ranch”. At that time, the AM was a daytimer with a full-power PSA and FM shut down between midnight and 6AM.

I was asked to fill in for another part-timer one Sunday morning—running various religious and public service shows until Top-40 resumed at 9AM. My morning began with a highly-emotional “fire in the belly” Pentecostal preacher who performed his weekly radio ritual live from the WHON studios at 6AM sign-on. To call this man “excitable” is an understatement—he managed to fracture TWO of the station’s ribbon microphones before the CE finally picked up a $14 Radio Shack dynamic model on a trip to redeem his numerous battery-of-the-month cards.

I arrived at the station; powered up both transmitters; kicked off Miss Patti and her friends on FM; turned on Brother Jim’s Realistic highball; then retired to the restroom for my “constitution”. Jim was really jumpin’ that particular morning—bellowing repeated references to “the fire of hell” and warnings to the radio faithful that Satan was posed that very morning to move against him. I was managing all this drama fairly well until the phone rang...

“Your station’s on fire” screamed a caller. I dashed thru and around the building to verify that no real emergency was occurring. Another call quickly followed—“You’re on fire!”... I responded: “Yep, Brother Jim IS extra spicy this morning isn’t he?” I had been warned about prank calls from delusional rock ‘n roll fans who grew impatient with the Brother’s bluster... But they kept coming in. Finally one caller said “Your TOWER’s on fire” - “Yeah RIGHT” I exclaimed - wondering how in the heck nearly five-hundred feet of steel could be sprouting flames. That neighbor called right back, identified himself, and made the assurance that he WASN’T hazing me.

I dashed out the transmitter room door, and to my horror saw the top element of the FM antenna ablaze. WQLK employed radomes on each bay to shed ice. Several hours earlier, a hefty storm had rolled thru, and the FM had taken a hit which cracked the top white cylinder. Water had managed to collect and arcing began when power was applied to the system—setting the synthetic cover on fire. Indeed, the station WAS on fire as the callers alleged.

I killed the FM rig and as I franticly called the CE, Brother Jim requested his mid-show gospel music break and entered the AM control room to learn of our station’s dilemma. You can surly predict how he played this event upon his return to the air. “Friends and neighbors out thar in radio lan-da... The Devil has indeed brought his wrath to this very station on this holy morning... The station I come to you on is now-consumed with Satan’s fire as I speak... I will stand against his evil and refuse to leave the air” he screamed.

I finally managed to stir the CE who wasn’t overly alarmed. “It’s only FM... ‘Just leave the damn thing off” he mumbled. [My how times change] Brother Jim concluded his radio service, handed me the envelope with his $100 time payment check, and I hit “play” on the Ampex 440—it was 6:30 and time for the very popular Indiana State Police Road Show.

 

[dave johnson]

I have three quick ones

1) In the early 90's I was hosting a Southern Gospel request show on WIOK in Falmouth, Kentucky called "Tri-State After Dark". I remember coming in to the air studio one day and the owner's son was on the board and he was in a very foul mood. I noticed that the on-air phone was in pieces. I asked him what happened. He told me that he got upset because people were hanging up on him and he slammed the phone down and shattered it. I thanked him for giving me an easy night because now I can't take calls. He turned very pale afterwards. *If anyone other than the owner's son would have done that, they would have been out the door*

2) I had just started with Froggy here in Lima. The OM got here just six months before I did, so he wanted to get to know the staff better outside of work. So he invited the whole gang over to his place for a few drinks. When he noticed a couple of Christian stations on my resume, he wasn't sure if I would show up. Being totally curious of the persons I was working with, I showed up to everyone's surprise. About two hours after I got there, everyone but me *I had an airshift to do in the morning* started doing shots. The OM screamed "I love this Country!" after his first shot of tequila...which almost doubled me over in laughter. Then...the OM came up with this radio 101 wisdom.....
"If you want to find the easiest way to get something done, give the job to the laziest son-of-a-bitch and he'll find a way....and HE's the laziest son-of-a-bitch I know."
He pointed to the afternoon drive guy from our Zoo station......to which he stood, stomped his foot and proclaimed, "I AM NOT LAZY!!!!"
I almost wet my pants. It was too damn funny. They are both OM at their respective companies now.

Speaking of the "Zoo" guy.....

3) He introduced himself the first day I was on the air on Froggy like this, "HI. JB show from 92 Zoo. Welcome aboard. Now I'm gonna kick your ass." When I replied, "So, does that mean I'll still get to take my 3:30 nap?", he knew he had a friend. He invited me to a get together at his place and I got to meet a few of his friends. About three hours into the party, I'm sitting behind him and all I see is his elbow appearing and disappearing. He turns his head, looks at me and says, "Hopperfield, I can't feel my junk!!!". He proceeds to punch himself in the crotch about six times as hard as he can. The next day, he comes in to work walking like he jumped off a saddle after a long ride on horseback.

Ah yes...those were the days......

 

[RadioStationDudeUSA]

I've worked in radio for a few years, but jeez, I don't have quite any stories this funny.. just mainly operator error and technical mishaps.

 

[gr8oldies]

The preacher story from Richmond was great! It does remind me of Sister Treva, a soft-spoken pentecostal preacher up the road in Portland at WPGW. She'd issue a quiet good morning to me, walk in the big studio with a piano, and proceed to scream loudly. As the VU meter wrapped itself around it's pin, her cohort jumped in screaming about being cured of an incurable disease-ahh!

Another evangelist, whose program was called interestingly enough "The Evangelist", showed up at WILO in Frankfort IN 45 minutes early for his 15 minute live program. He'd shoot the bull with me or whoever was there, (whether we wanted him to or not), then launch about the fires of hell for 15 minutes 9apparently no souls needed saved the one Sunday a month he took off).