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My Dinner With Doris

Actually, more like a late lunch. And I do feel guilty posting this, but I'll deal with it.

Listening time: 2:30-3 PM
Number of callers: 2

The rant during this 30 minute segment was all about how bailing out underwater home-owners was akin to socialization. There was a lengthy personal history where she recounted the first home she and her wife purchased in Ballard. I was near tears. How she ALWAYS puts down 25 per cent and NEVER pays PMI and ALWAYS lives within her means. And both callers agreed with her during their whole :90. Talk radio is the BEST!

There was no mention, of course, of how much of her current home is/was pimped out. And what kind of mortgage deal she received from some of the slew of mortgage shysters who advertise with regularity. Some might say - "She worked hard for what she has!" Yes, that three hours a day talking can sometimes strain the tongue. "What about show prep?" Yes, we need to count that as well because reading the paper and visting cnn.com can certainly be strenuous. But there's always that pimped-out hot tub to relax in after a hard castigating the poor suckers who actually believed people who worked for banks and mortgage brokers.

If everyone was like Doris, this country would be far better off. We'd be driving traded-out Jags, living in traded-out homes, chopping wood with an M-16 nearby in case someone dared get too close and reciting the pledge of Allegiance on the hour, every hour. We men would all have cropped hair and threaten to punch each other in the face and the women would all wear dresses and strings of pearls as they mopped the floor with **** n Span.

This country used to be a wonderful place. But now a gal can't even vent on her radio show without someone actually disagreeing or (have mercy!) mock her!!!

Actually, I'd pay cash money to see a cage fight between Doris and the Ambiguously Gay Duo of Ron & Don - now THAT would be money well spent.

BTW - Doris? I told my young son about the bail out plan that upset you so much and you yelled that he and HIS kids would be paying for it. He said if it keeps your bp elevated, it's worth it.

I love that kid.
 
jupiter 2 writes - >> This rant is actually funny :) <<

And that's my point. Anyone can write someone sucks or stinks or cuss them out. But these rants can actually bring writing to a higher level - at least in my case. I've had plenty of the "you suck" calls & e-mails (before anyone fires off a "it figures" post - I've had 95% positive stuff; we in media are used to having our apples polished but still, the occasional nasty-gram hurts) but if a listener rips me intelligently and in a literate fashion, I might actually pay attention. PLUS - if a talk host can rip whomever at will (as Doris does with Obama, for example) then a listener surely has license to do the same. With an average of 4-6 callers an hour, not many of us will get on to squirt a little stink juice, so ... we go online!

BTW - I actually checked out the video on Dori's limpid "blog"; the one where he's walking around like a pouting nancy boy about his control room. MAN does he look a lot like a cross between Bud Abbott and Crazy Guggenheim (Google 'em if you must) - plus it seems as Mr. "I'll Punch You In The Face" has been spending a little too much time at the training table. Dori? Next sales meeting, why not ck out the availability of a Weight Watchers trade. I know they usually use women like Marie Osmond but just get your Doris on and you're good to go.
 
WKomm said:
jupiter 2 writes - >> This rant is actually funny :) <<

And that's my point. Anyone can write someone sucks or stinks or cuss them out. But these rants can actually bring writing to a higher level - at least in my case. I've had plenty of the "you suck" calls & e-mails (before anyone fires off a "it figures" post - I've had 95% positive stuff; we in media are used to having our apples polished but still, the occasional nasty-gram hurts) but if a listener rips me intelligently and in a literate fashion, I might actually pay attention. PLUS - if a talk host can rip whomever at will (as Doris does with Obama, for example) then a listener surely has license to do the same. With an average of 4-6 callers an hour, not many of us will get on to squirt a little stink juice, so ... we go online!

BTW - I actually checked out the video on Dori's limpid "blog"; the one where he's walking around like a pouting nancy boy about his control room. MAN does he look a lot like a cross between Bud Abbott and Crazy Guggenheim (Google 'em if you must) - plus it seems as Mr. "I'll Punch You In The Face" has been spending a little too much time at the training table. Dori? Next sales meeting, why not ck out the availability of a Weight Watchers trade. I know they usually use women like Marie Osmond but just get your Doris on and you're good to go.

I know this is off topic, but since you brought her up...Marie Osmond is hotter today as a divorced mother of eight than she was when she was younger and making hit pop records.
 
Grindlfan - Hot women should never be considered off topic and I agree with you. Those Osmonds have unreal genetic make-up. Marie gets hotter and Donny still looks great while the rest of us sag and fall apart.

BTW - knowing a little bit about Marie first-hand, I think she is in serious need of some solid therapy. Her life is nothing but drama ... but she is lookin' good!
 
Well, I agree about Donny and Marie. They have held up very well over the years, especially Marie. As for the other brothers, time has not been as kind. Even Jimmy looks old, and overweight. He actually looks older than Donny. This is criticism from someone who can't bear to look at himself naked getting out of the shower, so who am I to be critical? I do enjoy a gander at Marie though and her Nutri-system commercials are delightful... IMHO.
 
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