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nightfly61
Guest
Nightfly is immediately hired and made employee of the year by ClearChannel Corporate at 150k a year to put all these cost slashing tecniques into effect but is instantly fired by self due to budget cuts.RF Man said:(Nighfly picks his teeth to remove some of the caca he's been spewing). Kentucky media buys "I was right and I like me" T-shirts. Nathan Obral no longer needs an inhaler feeling like a real broadcaster again. ;D
nightfly61 said:(Nightfly puts on his sunglasses). Are the beamed in voices really out of some cornfield in Omaha?Is that mid day voice still on there that sounds like he's gritting his teeth when saying his esses?
Here's more ways they can slash costs before it all caves in:
charge the 1 or 2 jocks you have left rental for studio time. better yet if there are more than 1 jock, why?
encourage 1 jock that's left to sound like they're from Omaha to make stations sound more "balanced out"
charge the 1 jock that's left a fee every time they say their name as a "self advertising" charge.
do away with all newspaper/trade magazine subscriptions.
put in pay toilets.
do away with coffee, tea, drinking water, paper cups, condiments, first aid kit. You get hurt there's the door.
do away with heat & air condition. Tell staff to dress accordingly or there's the door.
bring your own toiletries including towels & t.p.
take out energy consuming personal convenience station & lunch room or charge for use of electric microwave & refrigerator freon charge.
charge jocks on remotes for use of equipment.
no cel phone or smoke breaks.
any free food brought in as trade out, do not give to jock (tell them to lie on air & say it tastes great), but instead take to the nearest homeless shelter & use as a tax write off.
convince listeners that paper t-shirts are the "in thing" & sell those with station logo on front.
charge office staff for use of internet, pens, phone, desk space rental, etc.
have asst. GM syphon gas from employee vehicles for use in station van/management vehicle during long mandatory full staff meeting. (He'll call GM after he's sucked the whole lot dry then meeting will let out. Charge admission to mandatory meeting).
charge for parking, including listeners picking up prizes.
charge release fee on prizes of no value.
use acreage behind/ in front of station to grow fruit/ vegetables. what can't be sold to neighbors/tourists, donate to local shelter & use as tax write off. Better idea than Dick Goddard's TV8 Acres.
skip rock salt & plow service. If you can't make it in there's the door.
dock overweight employees for moving slower than rest. $5 per lb. over what their average weight should be.
give mandatory seminar on staying skinny. Charge admission.
do away with lunch hour. like Mr. Hand said - "Eating will be done on YOUR time".
have "intern appreciation month" where interns run all aspects of station. for free. Charge them for use of freedom.
BAS wrings hands together, licks chops & picks up Nightfly as a "key jockey operator" for their favorite new announcer killing toy...
http://www.research.att.com/~ttsweb/tts/demo.php...and procedes to pay Nightfly in vegetables & more I.O.U's than Lee Greenwood until they sell all the mics & c.d players(none needed anymore).
