Perfect Morning Show?

[Plum]

Good Morning Atlanta! What do you want to listen to when you drive to work in the morning? Or when you wake up? Here's my list: I need to know the time (a lot!) I need to know if its going to be hot or cold or windy or rainy or sunny. I'd like to know if there's been some world shaking news while I was sleeping...did a train crash somewhere? Was there an earthquake? How many people did that crazy guy shoot and did they get him? Whatever. I don't necessarily need to know about the overnight shooting in Atlanta or the apartment house fire in Dekalb right away, maybe just "in the news" of the day. I need to know if there is a delay on "my" route to work. First thing out of the traffic announcers mouth should be where the "big" delay is. Do the celebrities impact my life in any way? Not really but a one minute "hollywood" report doesn't kill me. Anything beyond that is of no interest to me? What dress did they wear? What dui did they get? Who cares! (your 15 year old?) Brad or Angelina or Jennifer or Nicole do not affect my life in any way.
I'd like to know if my team won or lost the night before. I'd like to hear a couple of tunes....Like an old fashioned top 40 show--play the number one pop hit or the number one country hit or maybe the newest song by a "core" group or artist! I'd like to hear a new Eagles tune and I'd also like to hear Avril Levignes new song too! I'd like the 2 or 3 folks on the air to joke around a bit too and maybe take a "few" phone calls not calls during the whole show though. All this between 5:30 and 9:30. I don't want to hear jocks who talk to hear the sound of their voice. I don't want to hear hip hop or rap music nor do I want middle of the road music. I don't want someone "yelling" or "screaming" at me. I want to hear friendly voices and I don't want to hear bathroom topics or language or any kind of bashing. I am so old fashioned to want all this. I don't have satellite yet but will be going there soon. If you asked me who I like in this market I guess I'd have to say Mara Davis--she's real and they let her have fun on the air. That's what I want. What do you other radio folks want?

 

[bclark71.]

I'd like to hear what you described below. Because of this, I will guess that you are past the age of 35. (Like me.)

Good Morning Atlanta! What do you want to listen to when you drive to work in the morning? Or when you wake up? Here's my list: I need to know the time (a lot!) I need to know if its going to be hot or cold or windy or rainy or sunny. I'd like to know if there's been some world shaking news while I was sleeping...did a train crash somewhere? Was there an earthquake? How many people did that crazy guy shoot and did they get him? Whatever. I don't necessarily need to know about the overnight shooting in Atlanta or the apartment house fire in Dekalb right away, maybe just "in the news" of the day. I need to know if there is a delay on "my" route to work. First thing out of the traffic announcers mouth should be where the "big" delay is. Do the celebrities impact my life in any way? Not really but a one minute "hollywood" report doesn't kill me. Anything beyond that is of no interest to me? What dress did they wear? What dui did they get? Who cares! (your 15 year old?) Brad or Angelina or Jennifer or Nicole do not affect my life in any way.
I'd like to know if my team won or lost the night before. I'd like to hear a couple of tunes....Like an old fashioned top 40 show--play the number one pop hit or the number one country hit or maybe the newest song by a "core" group or artist! I'd like to hear a new Eagles tune and I'd also like to hear Avril Levignes new song too! I'd like the 2 or 3 folks on the air to joke around a bit too and maybe take a "few" phone calls not calls during the whole show though. All this between 5:30 and 9:30. I don't want to hear jocks who talk to hear the sound of their voice. I don't want to hear hip hop or rap music nor do I want middle of the road music. I don't want someone "yelling" or "screaming" at me. I want to hear friendly voices and I don't want to hear bathroom topics or language or any kind of bashing. I am so old fashioned to want all this. I don't have satellite yet but will be going there soon. If you asked me who I like in this market I guess I'd have to say Mara Davis--she's real and they let her have fun on the air. That's what I want. What do you other radio folks want?

 

[LarryWachs]

Oh, sweet brevity, where art thou?

 

[ClarkKent]

I'm guessing Plum didn't get an A in English class...

There's so much you could pick apart in that post. But I'm far too tired to bother.

 

[AMCM]

Reading this gave me a headache.

 

[trusty]

Interesting concept - information on a need-to-know basis. This means that general news reports are inserted into the traffic news during the morning drive instead of the other way around. The only AM station that can do it is WSB - the only one that has the signal to reach commuters during the winter months.

It would have to be either SB or an FM. Don't see it happening.

 

[troone]

I'm guessing Plum didn't get an A in English class...

There's so much you could pick apart in that post. But I'm far too tired to bother.

Great post. Basically you're saying, "I'm going to spend time patronizing you, sir, and then tell you that I dont have time to patronize you further."

Poor guy's just having his say. Leave him alone.

 

[littlejohn]

The perfect morning show will be me n Taylorengineer playing the more popular cuts of trailetrtrash music complete with pedal steel. It will be informative, cos we've contracted with Metro for traffic and news. We'll be voicetracking it last night over a bottle, and phoning it in before we crash. His kids squawking in the background will be the counterpoint to my dogs barking, thereby lulling the Teeming Millions into believeing that a) it's live; and b) we're both in the same studio. We're gonna sell annual contracts, and block purchase the time form a deserving FM. Our telephone bits will be calls to people with whom we've worked in the past, and on whom we have sufficient blackmail material to ensure a 'good' response on the phone. You heard it here first.

 

[Merlin Berlin]

Our telephone bits will be calls to people with whom we've worked in the past, and on whom we have sufficient blackmail material to ensure a 'good' response on the phone.

You mean like The Bert Show?

 

[radiojunki]

What?! Like War of the Roses?? :

 

[littlejohn]

Oh no, this will be much headier. Between us we've decades of blackmail nformation on hand. And, we just signed our very first annual sponsor, the famous men's magazine, "Truck and Testicle". We shall be both rich and famous.

 

[DashRiprock]

I hear the perfect morning show every day. No fake phone calls, no Bert. Unfortunately, the signal strength is worse than 640 so it will never have any impact on Q100.

It’s called the Morning Dash on 102.1, and it gets a phenomenal 100 share on the Riprock PPM. It’s a mix of content that includes OnA, local news and traffic on WSB-AM, comedy on XM150, a few tunes on XM40 and 44, some random podcast on the mp3 player, and the occasional old radio classic on XM164.

 

[seabass]

I hear the perfect morning show every day. No fake phone calls, no Bert. Unfortunately, the signal strength is worse than 640 so it will never have any impact on Q100.

It’s called the Morning Dash on 102.1, and it gets a phenomenal 100 share on the Riprock PPM. It’s a mix of content that includes OnA, local news and traffic on WSB-AM, comedy on XM150, a few tunes on XM40 and 44, some random podcast on the mp3 player, and the occasional old radio classic on XM164.

Congratulations on yourself.

 

[bdcsi]

Plum.... that sounds like the old Bobby Harper, Kathy Fishman show on WSB AM.. before the how many times can we say WSB in 15 minutes mentality started. Sure seems to me that so many things that are done in radio are to impress other people in radio versus providing a service to the public.

BD

 

[taylorengineer]

"Put a little Taylor in yer trailer and a little John too......"

I think this might have some possibilities!

Welcoming promotion:
I have a 1974 Fleetwood doublewide we could give away. Put that sucka on a concrete block foundation in the parking lot of Lenox Square....me and littlejohn could live in it with a bunch of big breasted strippers until we give it away. We could do the mornin' show from there and raise money for Wahavian midgets with B.F.A.
Outstanding qualifications:
I wouldn't even have to dress up.........I think I still have my red and white checkered jacket from when I worked at the Piggly Wiggly meat market in Bomart. My complete stupidity and lack of social awareness has been well documented by mental health officials along with local radio management. My credentials are quite complete to join the ranks of Atlanta morning show hosts. Littlejohn has similar offensive qualities which are too numerous to mention here.

Typical hour music:
Pink Flamingo - Jerry Springer
White Trash Christmas - Bob Rivers
Granny Woncha Smoke Some Mary-j-uana - John Hartford
Panama Red - Commander Cody
Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw - Jimmy Buffet
If You Don't Stop Runnin' Around On Me(I'm Gonna Beat The Cheat Out Of You) - Pinkard and Bowden
Crooked Judge - New Riders
Your Cheatin' Heart - Hank Sr
Ballad of Hank Williams - Hank Jr.
You Never Call Me By MY Name - David Allen Coe


Me and Littlejohn together could be dumber than dirt........Atlanta would love us.
And then WE could make the engineers wash OUR cars and unplug OUR toilet.....
I'm startin' to feel giddy......

 

[littlejohn]

Listen I have (no foolin') a 1977 model Itasca RV. >With< antique tags on it. And a generator. We could do remotes from the side of the trailer. And let the engineers drive the honeywagon by each day and drain the tanks and pick up the empty PBR cans. Lord knows I have enough dogs to populate the yard. I'm going to host the Liberal Hour:

'Jesus Is Coming ' - Bellamy Bros
'Emma - Jean' - Amazing Rythm Aces
'The Winner' - Bobby Bare
'Hello, I'm a Truck' - Red Sovine
'Walkin' the Dog' - Run C & W
'Pit Bulls and Chainsaws' - Bellamy Bros
'Elvira' - Dallas Frazier (I detest covers)
'Down In The River To Pray' - Emmylou Harris
'Some days Are Diamonds' - John Denver

And for the Christmas song of the hour,

'The Twelve Days OF Christmas' - The Chad Mitchell Trio.

The Liberal Hour will be sponsored each day by the Chalres Hardy Dealerships, and the IDs will be followed by Charles Hisse'f proclaiming "We luuuv ya and we neeeeeed ya!"

Where's Gerry Correy? He's gonna be our Imaging Director. And, Leonard Postero (Is he still around?) will do sports. For news, we will announce at the bottom of each hour, "Now, tune to WSB for four minutes and then come back" and we'll monitor WSB and go silent until the hit the commercials in their news block. This will save a lot of money.

Surely some of the wannabe program people here crying about a lack of freshness in the genre will be prepared to buy something that can be heard and put us on. Since that will be the billboard message: "Put us on. After all, we're puttin' you on!!!'

 

[wombat]

Our telephone bits will be calls to people with whom we've worked in the past, and on whom we have sufficient blackmail material to ensure a 'good' response on the phone. You heard it here first.

call me! call me!! i'm good on the air AND i have sufficient blackmail material on taylorengineer!!

 

[taylorengineer]

Look at these playlists and tell me we wouldn't be great!
Of course Littlejohn and I will have to do a few videos for YouTube....that seems to be all the rage today when your tryin' out to be a mornin' radio star. We will also need a girl-radio star that sounds big breasted on the radio. What Atlanta girl radio star do you think sounds like she has the biggest breasts?
I think we should hire a morning show band too. I wonder what Darryl Rhoades is doing these days. I've got a five string guitar and know most of the words to Folsom Prison Blues. Littlejohn's Big White Dog can growl just like Trace Adkins sings.........
I've always wanted to do a combo pancake breakfast radio show. Starchy, sugary food can kill brain cells quicker than Red Rooster wine. Dumbing down yer audience is sooo important when yer a mornin' radio star...
Pancakes....doublewides....doublewide double plays.....gut wrenching country music....A Little john and Taylor in yer trailer....I think we may need an agent.

 

[taylorengineer]

Wombat, if I remember correctly, sounds big breasted on the radio......

 

[wombat]

Wombat, if I remember correctly, sounds big breasted on the radio......

i have indeed been told that once or twice!

and don't forget my inside knowledge of wrestling AND nascar!