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The Stupdiest Listener Calls I've Ever Gotten

Old standbys: Drunks at a party passing around the phone asking for the same song at 3am, thinking you're actually dumb enough to think "oh my God..it's 3am and EVERYBODY wants to hear Suzy Q. I'd better get it on right now!". Also some lady that left several messages on our voicemail system, explaining that we had to play her songs because "we're HAVING A PARTY" as though that should put her at the front of the line. <P ID="signature">______________
Greetings from Ohio-where the governor wants everyone to know he's sorry.</P>
 
We all have had those off the wall weird phone calls. Some of my classics are.
Old lady calling in to wonder why the football game isnt on the radio. I know the game is on the air because I'm engineering the broadcast. She tells me all that she hears is a loud buzzing static. I ask her if her radio is AM and FM she goes and looks and comes back to say it was on AM. I tell her to flip her switch to FM and kazam! there was the game. She was amazed and a little embarrased at the same moment.

You gotta love the requests. I had one from a guy working at a area gas stations (he reminds me of abu from the Simpsons). He requested his song and then asked how he goes about paying for his request and how much it will cost. I was caught off guard by his remark so I tell him his request is on the house for the night and I'll play his song.

Another one of my favorites was also a request. A guy called up the station saying he was taking his new girlfriend out for the night and at 10:00 he doesnt want to hear any of the teeny bopper (BLEEP) because he was getting laid tonight!! At 10 I played back the audio from the phone call and then played lets get it on!
 
How about:

"We've been mentioning this show all morning, and the phones have been lighting up! Now it's the moment you've all been waiting for, it's finally time to give these tickets away! ...(phone clicks on)... Hello, you're the lucky caller!! You won the tickets!!!"

"Uhhhh... who did I win tickets to see again?... Really?... Where did you say it was again?... Oh, I don't think I can make it all the way out there... When did you say it was again?... Oh, I don't think I can make it that night, I have to work..."
 
> Flip side: I once had an advertiser call the request line
> on a holiday demanding to talk to his account rep. He
> called the request line "because no one is answering your
> business office line".

I get that a lot too, and not just on holidays. The request/contest line is the number they remember, because they're not just advertisers, but active listeners as well (not a bad thing!)

My favorite call:

A former co-worker of mine had gone to work for another station in town. He was setting up to do a remote at an area business on a Saturday afternoon. He called in to check the marti shot...but called the wrong station! I had him moving and adjusting the antenna and swapping mike cords for close to ten minutes before he realized who he was talking to and where he called.
 
What's really stupid

So many of these calls from people who don't know what they are listening to.
And we still pay good money to Arbitron to have these same people fill out diaries and believe the results.
 
> Yet another dim bulb:
>
> "You're caller number seven! What station just made you a
> winner?"
>
> "Uhhh...*I can't remember*!"


Or on the same note, those people who will call and ask if they won the contest when there is no contest going on. Or on another contest note. We did a contest on our top fory stations where you had to listen for a certain group. I think it was three doors down. We had people callling during songs that sounded nothing like three doors down asking if they had won. I mean every artist, Britney Spears, Mariah Carey, Somebody even called During an Eminem song and asked if it was three doors down. That was one of those days you wanted to bang your head against the wall. Unfortunatly the sound proofing would not have aloud for any good brain dammage as it would act as soft padding for each blow to your head.
Or the people who will call just after I have announced that the fotball game will be starting late tonight and ask me if the game is starting late.

>
 
Re: who sings Mama's Got a Squeezebox?

> > "No really, who sings Mama's Got a Squeezebox?"
>
> This is the funniest thing I've read onn this site.
>
> Thank you for posting it.
>
> But you left out NATCH-urally!
>
> > "Have you ever heard of Abbott and Costello?"
>
> If you don't get the jole, read the transcript:
>
> http://www.baseball-almanac.com/humor4.shtml
>
> 73s from 954
>

Yep, enjoyable read. And you can also apply the same comedy to another well-known song....

"Which artist sings that song, American Woman?"
"Guess Who."
:)
 
Something almost like the topic..

About 8 years ago, working at a retail store (you know, can't afford to live only on a radio salary)....Answer the phone, and the person asks "Am I a winner?". Confused the heck out of me, but I played along. Turned out, the phone # at my store was similar to a competitor of a radio station that I worked at. I ended up giving them directions to the station to pick up their prize (the world famous WLIR/Garden City). Sorry, John!<P ID="signature">______________

</P>
 
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