Answering y'all's inquisitive fingers that, apparently, fell off the phone book while doin' all o' that walkin', n' remindin' one n' all that the die-rect hotline to the RCM Ranch is, was, n' always will be, 1-800-HAY-SEED.
Rosie's Dance Hall N' Saloon has no toll-free, however. 903-UR-DRUNK to place yer reservations at the bar. Unfortunately, with fundin' a lil' tight, the hayloft has no phone line, so I just make do with an ol' walkie talkie n' a bullhorn.