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Lousy theme songs

Concur with the earlier opinion about Two and a Half Men. The repeated "men, men, men, manly men, men" is beyond stupid. (Although the "morphing" thing with "Koocher" was kinda cool! 8)) And if the "kid's" character is in the Marines, then he, too, should be considered a "man." (Setting aside that actor's own personal opinion about his show.)

Another one that is a bit of a head-scratcher is Suburgatory. Mainly because it is so short.

I hesitate to criticize theme songs of current shows because most shows nowadays don't really even seem to have theme songs anymore. After all, that is another 30 seconds to one minute that the network could be showing commercials! :eek:

Homer and Marge Simpson's parody of the All in the Family theme song is hilarious! Updated for our generation!
 
Except that Burstyn - who was 42 when the film was produced in 1974, was 79 in 2011. Makes it hard to play a widow with a young child working in a diner.

The most recent thing I've seen Burstyn in was a couple years ago, when she had a recurring role in Big Love, as the mother of the oldest 'sister-wife' Barb playing by Jean Tripplehorn, who was in her mid 40s at the time.
 
Couple classics from Nelson Riddle: Route 66 & The Untouchables. Henry Mancini's Peter Gunn has been mentioned but I don't think Mr. Lucky has been.
 
Tim from Springfield said:
How could I have forgotten Faith Hill's "Sunday Night Football" theme? UGH!
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...whatever amount NBC paid Joan Jett and Desmond Child to desecrate their song "I Hate Myself for Loving You" like that is not enough to justify it. Even P!nk had to call it quits after a year or two before Hill got the gig...
 
bpatrick said:
Eydie Gorme's singing the "Life With Lucy" theme, which probably few people remember since the show was canceled so quickly (Wilbur Hatch could rest easy).
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Eydie Gorme gave it her best shot....but this theme is so sickeningly sweet....a person could become diabetic just listening to it.

Poor Lucy....nothing went right for her during that abortive 1986 comeback attempt.
 
Ultimajock said:
Tim from Springfield said:
How could I have forgotten Faith Hill's "Sunday Night Football" theme? UGH!
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...whatever amount NBC paid Joan Jett and Desmond Child to desecrate their song "I Hate Myself for Loving You" like that is not enough to justify it. Even P!nk had to call it quits after a year or two before Hill got the gig...
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Pink left after the 1st season, and if I remember correctly, it wasn't by choice.

It looked more like NBC and/or the NFL wanted to get rid of the brash, outspoken, tatted up Pink, and replace her with the wholesome, All-American girl Faith Hill
 
therealjm12 said:
Couple classics from Nelson Riddle: Route 66 & The Untouchables. Henry Mancini's Peter Gunn has been mentioned but I don't think Mr. Lucky has been.
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No, I forgot about "Mr. Lucky," another great theme song by a great composer.
 
jfrancispastirchak said:
skippercollector said:
I have to change the channel when I hear the theme from Frasier. I know a lot of people must like it, but not only do I think it is stupid, it gives me a headache.
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Yes, but, at 30-seconds or less, it's more of a sound-byte than a theme song. Thankfully!
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To clarify, my post refer's to the opening instrumental. The vocal, sung by Kelsey Grammer himself (I think) over the closing credits, runs a little longer than 30-secs, and reminds me why remote controls have mute buttons.
 
therealjm12 said:
Couple classics from Nelson Riddle: Route 66 & The Untouchables. Henry Mancini's Peter Gunn has been mentioned but I don't think Mr. Lucky has been.
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I thought this thread was "lousy" theme songs. I would call all 4 of those classics of the genre.

Speaking of Henry Mancini - even with a great composer, it's all in the arrangement. I would call Mancini's theme for What's Happenning lousy, mostly because of that irritating "boing" sound effect.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpBhrjfetkk

But the theme for the 80s reboot - What's Happenning Now one of the better TV themes. Saxaphones fix everything.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1jQc9YAH1Y


Another great Mancini theme - Cade's County, the very decent Glenn Ford/Edgar Buchannan crime drama that only lasted one season (72-73). It's reminisscent of his theme for the NBC Mystery Movie. I guess Henry got into synthesizers for a time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8X0Ooe7DWc
 
The Ropers (creepy-looking Norman Fell dancing with a plunger)
The Hogan Family (Roberta Flack - life is such a sweet insanity...)
Full House, Family Matters, Perfect Strangers, Step by Step (all those Miller-Boyett shows used that same overbearing Survivor-sounding guy)
Small Wonder (she's fantastic, made of plastic, microchips here and there)
One Day at a Time (wop on the beat? The ending version was good though)
 
I'm glad someone brought up One Day At A Time. I cannot think of any theme worse than that. Plus, maybe I'm in the minority, but I prefer the season 1 Munsters theme-the organ-and-tuba driven version over the season 2 one.
 
I don't have a nomination for a lousy theme song, but I've always sort of cringed whenever hear the star of a show sing their own theme song...some examples have always been named, like Nell Carter on Gimme a Break (never mind the fact she was a theater actress/singer before going to TV), and Linda Lavin on Alice.

My own notable exception would Will Smith's Fresh Price of Bel-Air theme...it was always catchy and funny.
 
71dude said:
One Day at a Time (wop on the beat? The ending version was good though)
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Not necessarily disagreeing with your choice, but wasn't that line "up on your feet" or something like that?

For the longest time, I thought that "Edith" (Jean Stapleton) was singing something about "sour red grapes" in the All in the Family theme song, when she was actually saying that their "LaSalle ran great." Given that I am nowhere near old enough to remember the LaSalle, I suppose that confusion was understandable. (Just as an aside, I always found it humorous that Archie sat at the piano with Edith to sing that theme song, while anywhere else during the rest of the show, Archie was always complaining about her singing! :eek:)
 
Arguably the worst direction a producer can give a songwriter is "give me something fresh but familiar." This is how musical atrocities like the retooled theme song for "Get Smart" came about. The re-written theme along with the entire final season was probably the lowest point for an otherwise brilliant show.
 
Being a "Vidiot" in good standing I'd be remiss not to mention "The Life And Legend Of Wyatt Earp" now playing on the Western Channel. At each scene change there's this horrendous "Ahhh..Ahhh.." that sounds like the Vienna Boys Choir all grown up!

It's got to be in my Top Five Of All Time Worst Classic TV Themes!...Best? Nelson Riddle's "Route 66." Can you imagine the budget for that show today? A different location every week. CBS rigged up a Chevy station wagon so Martin Milner's family could travel with him. Saw the episode (filmed in Corpus Christi) that introduced the C-2. I watched a scene shot on North Beach. I said.."someday I'll get one of those." Got two..a '64 and a '95..talk about product placement! Man, that series sold more 'Vettes than any TV spot! Sorry to ramble..Johnny / San Antonio
 
firepoint525 said:
71dude said:
For the longest time, I thought that "Edith" (Jean Stapleton) was singing something about "sour red grapes" in the All in the Family theme song, when she was actually saying that their "LaSalle ran great." Given that I am nowhere near old enough to remember the LaSalle, I suppose that confusion was understandable. (Just as an aside, I always found it humorous that Archie sat at the piano with Edith to sing that theme song, while anywhere else during the rest of the show, Archie was always complaining about her singing! :eek:)
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Given that the last LaSalle was made 73 years ago (1940), you would have to be pushing 80, and be a childhood auto enthusiast - to remember it. Assuming Archie was Carol O'Connor's age (b. 1924), even he would have been young (16) when the last LaSalle was produced.
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firepoint525 said:
For the longest time, I thought that "Edith" (Jean Stapleton) was singing something about "sour red grapes" in the All in the Family theme song, when she was actually saying that their "LaSalle ran great." Given that I am nowhere near old enough to remember the LaSalle, I suppose that confusion was understandable. (Just as an aside, I always found it humorous that Archie sat at the piano with Edith to sing that theme song, while anywhere else during the rest of the show, Archie was always complaining about her singing! :eek:)
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Enough people wrote to the producers about not understanding what Edith was saying that in the updated version of the opening she and Carroll O'Connor did, she v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y said "Gee, our old LaSalle ran great."
 
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